Near Dark

This is the original vampire movie with all the emotions and drama and none of the glitzy homo gore that Hollywood has since added to the genre. The bullets are real, the blood lust is tangible, and the camaraderie is well played.

Even vampires have need of a family.

Near Dark
Near Dark

The plot suggests the trials and tribulations of the first homosexual encounter. The danger, the thrill, the rush of violating every moral law on the books. There’s not only no accountability, you’re even (like a gang of thieves after a heist) a hero among your peers afterward.

There’s a cost to remaining gay, just like a vampire needs a constant supply of human blood to survive. Gays need constant sexual prodding, masturbating, to naked male pornography to survive, in a process called orgasmic reconditioning. A gay in the absence of lust-provoking images reverts to heterosexuality after a short transfusion of reality.

Every gay man remembers his first “kill.” It’s his pride and joy, his triumph. Vampire’s victims die physically. Gay’s are killed spiritually and morally. Even those who resist the gay man’s relentless aggression are forever changed.

The victims of gays become schizophrenic. The toll in anguish and suffering in the wake of gays is incalculable. The cost to society in treating the schizophrenic victims, in their loss of productivity, in their burden to their family — is staggering.

But no, gay’s are gentile, docile creatures. Right. Gays in the military commit ten times the sexual assaults of other service members.

Gays are ruthless, feral creatures — especially when aroused beyond their capacity in an environment like the military, surrounded by nubile, strapping young men ripe for the picking.

" Hey, it's better than being bald. "
” Hey, it’s better than being bald. “